Happy Valentine’s Day!  On second thought…maybe we should say, “Happy Focus-Love-On-Someone-Else Day!”  Today’s the day to think of who we love and who loves us.  Some of us look forward to it every year and go big on expressions of love.  Some…not so much.  Let’s be honest.  Valentine’s Day is an other-focused, Hallmark holiday.  It can be a real bummer for many who wish they had an ‘other’ to share loving feelings with.  For them, today is a reminder of the love that’s missing in their life.

What if wishing for someone else to bring you chocolate and flowers isn’t the answer?  What if the key to finding joy in this day is to put the focus on yourself?  Love yourself.  Now you might say, “Love is something that others are supposed to give to us.”  Maybe the notion of expressing love to yourself today feels weird, self-indulgent, even selfish.  Perhaps you find yourself resisting the idea because you don’t know how to do it.  But, what if it’s easier than you think?


Self-love doesn’t require effort.  It’s a way of being with yourself – a compassionate consideration that’s no different from how you would treat a friend or loved one.  It’s about being present, moment by moment, with your own heart’s experience and offering love and kindness, without judgement, to yourself.  Self-love considers your heart and soul with mindfulness and gives you permission to matter today and all days.  It nourishes the spirit and makes us vessels of kindness.


So today, put yourself on your Valentine’s list.  Nourish your own heart.  Ask yourself, “How can I express love to myself in this moment?”  Keep company with your own soul not just today but every day.  Give yourself chocolate and flowers.  Better yet…plant a flower garden in your own soul.  It just may be the beginning of a life-long romance!

little boy eating strawberries


  • Engage in one of your favorite activities
  • Smile to yourself in the mirror
  • Treat yourself to something that will benefit your life
  • Listen to your favorite artist
  • Find things to compliment yourself on
  • Explore somewhere you’ve always wanted to go
  • Take time to relax and recharge
  • Spend time with a good friend or loved one
  • Plan a vacation
  • Forgive yourself